The idiosyncrasies of France and the French

Travelling is a constant source of questions and misunderstandings. Why do they do that here? is a constant question, about everything from politics to food habits to the very mundane.

So here's some of our observations and questions:

1. When is a village a collection of houses or a real village?
The size of villages varies we noticed, as we twisted and turned to get through the often narrow streets.

There seems to be four criteria:

Flower stall at Rennes Market

A. Every village has a florist. I know that we think of France and we picture a French person in beret with a baguette and a bunch of flowers. Even in the tiniest villages there is always a flower shop and they seem to do good business.

B. Every village has at least one Boulangerie. The national requirement is for at least one baguette and/or croissants or pastries of some kind every day, I'm sure. Often you see people emerging from their local Boulangerie with two or three baguettes to get them through the day. We have tried all sorts of versions of the basic baguette, and as long as they are straight from the oven they are all delicious.Some crusty, some soft, some golden, some brown ......and with lots of butter or cheese they are just superb.

C. Every village has a kebab shop: truly!

D. Every village has a Jesus on the cross statue, either close to the entry to the village or at the exit: presumably to bless you for coming or bless your ongoing journey. The range is enormous but who knows if they help? Only God I guess!

To qualify to be a town there are some additional criteria:

E. A carousel with the usual assortment of smiling animals, teacups, boats etc to ride, but here frequently,you can also ride on a ferocious big black bull. Interesting.

F. A tourist train. Because of their compact size these are common in places where the alleyways are too narrow for a bus. You can be walking around the ancient lanes or alleyways and suddenly you have to flatten yourself against the wall or in a doorway, or you are in dire danger of being run over by a brightly coloured Tourist train, usually with every passenger over 70 or under 5, often with a loud prerecorded voice giving information. Delightful! I think driving one of them would have to be very trying. Not only do you have to deal with stupid tourists you have to hear the same information over and over ........and over again. I can't be too critical as I may end up in one some day!

Hotel Ville in Limoges: note the pruned trees!

G. A Hotel de Ville. There seems to be a version of the Town Hall even in very tiny towns. Often they are the grandest building in town, and I have no doubt there is a lot of competition amongst towns to have the largest and most ornate. Many of them fly multiple French flags making them easy to identify.

The largest Hotel Ville we've seen so far: Dijon

H. A war memorial . As in Australian towns these are very common , but here they not only commemorate soldiers, navy men and airmen who have died, but the local people who lost their lives opposing the Germans too And some of them recognise the sacrifices of the Resistance fighters.

A beautiful statue and monument for resistance fighters , some of whom are buried in this memorial : Saint Malo 

2. Who carries guns and why?

When we stopped in Poitiers for the day, Ewan headed back to the car to put more money in the parking meter after we spotted not one parking officer, but a group of four  - and one of them was armed with a pistol. Makes you think twice about not paying for a parking ticket!

In a number of cities we have been innocently wandering around and suddenly a group of soldiers arrives, not only armed with pistols on their belts, but carrying machine guns, and with very serious expressions on their faces. They only look about 17 years old to me, which is even more worrying.

The first time they walked past us was in Limoges, which we couldn't explain at all. But when we were  staying on the outskirts of the old part of town in Bordeaux there were soldiers standing watching a particular street for hours. There were lots of North Africans, Muslims and immigrants living in this area. Liz looked the address up on Google maps and it turned out that it was the headquarters of the local Muslim Association and there was a mosque, although not able to be seen from the street.

The next time was in the city centre of Toulouse when a line of wedding cars arrived all tooting their horns loudly, which is typical wedding behaviour here. We had noticed a group of soldiers arrive in a van, fully armed. I was going to take a photo of the wedding cars next to the soldiers but didn't bother as I couldn't get a good shot. One of the soldiers came up to me and asked if I had taken a photo of any soldiers and when I said no, he left. Interesting! Then we realised that we were standing next to the marriage registry office and many of the wedding guests were wearing hijabs.

It's hard to know what to make of all this, but it did emphasise how safe we are in Australia, so far.

3. Trees: why do they butcher them?

One of the first things we noticed was that in many public places the street trees had been severely pruned . In Australia they are often pruned to prevent contact with electricity cables. But here, where  there is underground power why would you? Many of them are in open spaces in parks or town squares where there should be no limitation. It is spring of course so they have clearly been pruned in winter and some are just starting to produce greenery, but currently they look gnarled and twisted - a bit like giant bonsai.

The other passion is topiary which isn't my favourite but I can appreciate the artistry. In general the choice seems to be very manicured gardens or none at all in private homes.

4. Where are all of the cows?
For a country that has so much cheese, which is so cheap, I just don't understand where the cows are. It's not winter so they aren't locked in barns. Fresh milk is hard to find but there's always masses of UHT milk which seems to imply that the milk comes from somewhere else in the EU I guess. Odd.

5. When is a baguette not a baguette?
One of the challenges , an enjoyable one, of traveling here is to work out the type of bread you are going to order when you wander into your local Boulangerie and there are multitudes of breadsticks lined up. A baguette is not a banette or a rustica or a pain campagne or....a whole lot of other options. they are all usually warm and fresh, as they bake twice each day here so all of them will taste fabulous with some butter and jam or cheese or whatever. But choosing which one is a nightmare: crispy crust or soft, golden brown or dark brown or pale yellow, with 'cereales' (grains) or not, fat or thin ........

6. Where are the indicators?
After driving around for weeks, Ewan would say that French cars appear to not have been fitted with indicators that work, as the sight of a blinking indicator seems rare!

7. Why are French women so thin?
I think there's been a few PhD theses written about this one, so I have no idea. Women certainly smoke a lot here but who knows.... I just wish there was an easy answer that I could copy!

8. Why do they think they can't speak English well!
Quite a few times when we ask someone if they speak English do they say they speak very little...... and then proceed to speak perfect English!


 So despite the idiosyncrasies we have loved being in France and the French have been extraordinarily tolerant of us and our basic French.... but I'm sure I'll think of a few more before we leave.

your very tolerant correspondent

Dianne